· I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
· When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
· I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
· I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.
I can't put it down.
· A cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils.
· When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
· I wondered why the ball was getting bigger.
Then it hit me!
· Broken pencils are pointless.
· England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
· I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
· All the toilets in London police stations have been stolen.
Police say they have nothing to go on.
· Cartoonist found dead in home.
Details are sketchy